Whoa mamma! Mariah Carey confuses my nether region. Is she hot or not hot? Does the bikini fit or should she be in a muu muu? Is she pleasantly plump or a moose? Usually the thought I have when I see her falling out of clothing is that if she’d stop paying attention to the number on the tag and buy clothes based on fit she’d look tons better. She looks thick to me in these pictures but not exactly what I’d call fat. The bikini could be a size or two larger, especially the bottom piece.

I’m so used to seeing skeletons in bikinis such as Nicole Richie and Micha Barton that I’ve forgotten what an averaged, normal sized woman should look like. You know, one that eats.

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Here is the video that we’ve all been waiting for! Carmen Electra riding the Sybian on Howard Stern’s Sirius satellite radio show.

After her experience, Carmen revealed to the DJ: “It feels great. I have toget one for the house. It’s awesome…This is the best thing I have ever felt in my life. I felt like I was going to take off.”

Max Factor has now confirmed the brunette’s contract is under review following her outrageous actions.

Oh fuck you, Max Factor. Carmen Electra has done way worse than this before. Everyone already knows that she’s a sex goddess. I’m boycotting Max Factor if they fire Carmen.

Give the video some time to load, it’s like six or eight minutes long… but it’s HOT and so worth the wait!

Source: All Headline News

Charlize Theron, who has said she will not marry hotty Stuart Townsend until gays can marry too, was honored for her support at the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) Awards. Theron won an Oscar in 2003 for her portrayal of lesbian serial killer Aileen Wuornos in ‘Monster’ and somehow dressing up real ugly when you’re drop dead gorgeous always scores you a statue.

What makes this interesting is that while Charlize was up on stage she had her ass grabbed by a woman twice her size. Then Charlize proceded to grab the woman’s ass in return. Hot stuff I assure you. Too bad that wasn’t Carmen Electra grabbing Charlize’s ass. Then Charlize would begin spanking Carmen and calling her a bad girl, and Carmen would reach back and pull Charlize’s hair. Mmmm…

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The title for this post really had me stumped. Pamela Anderson looks like a washed up hooker? Stripper? Porn star? Eh, she just looks like herself. Pam used to be so beautiful in her younger, Playboy years. Sans the enormous tits, missing eyebrows, huge overstuffed lips, and bleached out hair. She had a unique, naturally attractive look. Men around the world thought she was gorgeous then, and I guess some still do now, but all I see is plastic. Her next two procedures? May I recommend a tummy tuck and breast reduction? Also, Pam, lay off the black eyeliner please. It only makes you look older.

Here Pam is with the Pussycat Dolls… performing a poll dance? I know, it doesn’t make any sense to me either.

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As you’ve noticed by now, I typically lie in my post titles. Ahem. Carmen Electra was on Howard Stern’s Sirius satellite radio show this morning. And, like the good girl that she is, Carmen hopped on Howard’s penis. His mechanical penis that is, known as the Sybian.

Carmen was on Stern’s show today to promote her new movie, Scary Movie 4. (The previews look pretty funny, I must admit.) And, by the way, Carmen’s marriage is not in danger as has been previously reported, and Carmen and her husband, Dave Navarro, plan to have a baby in 2007.

These pictures are the hottest thing you’ll see all day. Nay… all weekend. Carmen is wearing a sexy black corset top with the cutest plaid miniskirt. I can’t wait for the video of this most coveted event to start making the internet rounds. For now the pictures will have to do. Click it.

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Ohhhh, what I meant was… Shannon Elizabeth likes to play poker! And here she is, opening day of the Venetian’s new poker room in Las Vegas. Pictures after the jump.

I have a theory… that Shannon took up playing poker to win enough money to pay her dickhead of a soon-to-be ex-husband off, as he’s suing her for half of all earnings, property, assets and investments she took home in the five years they spent living together before getting married.

What an ass. She’s the one with the cute face and killer boobs, not you.

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Whoa. Hot? Not hot? I can’t tell. There is the red hot sexy thong factor, but then there is the if it weren’t for the thong you’d see her ass crack factor. And the questions. Oh the questions! Look, not look. Tell her she needs to pull her pants up before or after you’ve made sure all your friends see… so very many questions.

(Click pic for larger view.)

CelebritiesEating.com features some amusing and oft times disgusting pictures of celebrities stuffing their faces. Of course the four pictures you’ll find here (after the jump) are the ones that turned me on. Gisele Bundchen with her cleavage and pizza, Heidi Klum with her fingers wrapped around a burger, Liv Tyler and her lips sucking a berry, and Jennifer Love Hewitt with a lollipop which I pretend is actually a penis. You’ll have to find the nasty pictures yourself.

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According to Ananova, singer Pink and her motocross racing hubby Carey Hart are apart so often that they resort to using webcams to have long distance cybersex with each other. That’s hot.

Pink says she has only seen hubby Carey Hart three times since they married in January. But she says their relationship is healthy and confesses they enjoy virtual sex, via webcam.

Source: Ananova

Wasn’t this just done not too long ago? With Colin Farrell as Jesse? Why yes, yes it was. I have an idea! If Brad Pitt and Colin Farrell are such fans of cowboy movies… why don’t the two of them hook up for Brokeback Mountain II??? Mmmm… man-love.

But who am I kidding, I’ll suffer through some pretty bad movies for a glimpse of Jennifer’s leftovers (Ocean’s Twelve anyone? blech!), and with the rumors that Brad shows some nekkie ass you know I’ll be front row center.

‘The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford‘ delves into the private life and public exploits of America’s most notorious outlaw. As the charismatic and unpredictable Jesse James plans his next great robbery, he wages war on his enemies, who are trying to collect the reward money — and the glory — riding on his capture. But the greatest threat to his life may ultimately come from those he trusts the most.

‘The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford‘ is supposed to be released some time this year. Three production photos after the hop skip and a jump.

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